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When I was in my 20s, I made the exciting decision to expand our company and open an office in Phoenix and quickly hired a manager (who I was told was the best thing since sliced bread) to oversee the new office. A few weeks later, while caring for my three-week-old son, it became painfully clear that I had to fire this manager. I left California and stayed in Phoenix while I began to clean up the mess I had helped create.
My wife, normally very easygoing, sat me down and very pointedly said that living in different states and being consumed by work was putting us on a fast track to divorce. If I wanted to stay married, something needed to change.
This was a gut punch, but it initiated the process of maturing me to grow out of the controlling, workaholic mentality that dictated my life for most of my 20s. First, I had to let go of the pervasive belief that I had to do everything myself–my marriage depended on it.
Most business owners have felt the same way at some point. You must hold onto as much control as possible because no one else will care about your business as much as you do, right?
The hard reality is that this is true–to some extent.
You will be hard-pressed to find someone who wants to put in the hours that you are willing to work because it is not their company. However, this does not mean that this person will not be exceptional at the job you have given them–if they are qualified and you allow them to do it.
Part of making this transition is coming to terms with the fact that you will make mistakes.
I once convinced an experienced restorer in the industry to join ATI as the manager of one of our offices. He ended up being terrible in this role. We lost so many staff, and I had to take over the office and run it myself for a short time. It turned out that this person was not manager material and thrived in an estimator role instead. After shifting him to the appropriate position, he was one of our best estimators and just celebrated his 15th year with ATI.
All of this led me to another important lesson in business ownership–how to put the right people in the right places. Without taking a chance on people and allowing them to do their jobs, I would have never come to this realization and would not have grown my ability to assess what individuals thrive in what roles. This skill has been key in building a strong team, allowing me to step back, focus on the bigger picture, and carve out time to be the type of husband and father I desire to be.
Lastly, I firmly believe that when you take a vacation, you should be on vacation. Call me an idealist, but with the right team, I think this is attainable for any owner in our industry. Of course, there will always be the possibility of a true emergency where someone will need to get ahold of you. To truly reserve connection for these situations, I will sometimes give my team my wife’s phone number in case they really need to contact me. Trust me, this approach guarantees you will only get a call when it is absolutely necessary.
As work in our industry starts to pick up and the pressure to stay constantly available and connected increases, I want to start a conversation about how we can create the kind of business ownership that allows us to thrive as parents, spouses, and successful leaders—all at the same time.
So, what are your family and business goals? How do you manage to balance it all?